As a short person myself, I thought I had heard every short joke under the sun, but I was wrong. Whether you know a short person or if you are one, these rare short people jokes will have you laughing out today!
Short people are everywhere. So, why not poke a “little” fun at your favorite short person with these hilarious short people jokes?
Remember, jokes are only funny if everyone is laughing. These jokes are not intended to be cruel or offensive. Use these at your own discretion and don’t be a bully.
50+ Hilarious short people jokes that will make you laugh out Big
1. Why did the short guy fall asleep in his harness and his helmet? Because he was tired from climbing into bed.
2. How do short people go shopping for pants? They buy shorts.
3. How does a short person reach the top shelf? They don’t.
4. What is a short person’s favorite side order? A small fry.
5. What is a short person’s favorite dessert? Strawberry Short Cake.
6. What do you call a short person with a bad spray tan? An Oompa Loompa.
7. Where do short people buy their shoes? The kid’s section.
8. How do short people shoot a bow and arrow? With a rubber band and a toothpick.
9. Where is the worst place for a short person to stand at a concert? Behind anyone at all.
10. Why did the short person bring a parachute to the bar? So they could get down from the barstool.
11. Why was the short guy scared of the wiener dog? Because it was too tall.
12. What 3 things does a short person need to take a bath? Floaties, a snorkel, and a lifeguard.
13. What do you call it when a short person waves at you? A microwave.
14. You’ve really gotta hand it to short people, because they usually can’t reach it anyway.
15. How does a short person look you in the eye? They get on a ladder.
16. God only lets things grow until they are perfect. Some of us didn’t take as long as others! –Short People
17. You know you’re short if you can play handball on the curb.
18. What does a short person call miniature golf? Golf.
19. What kind of horse does a short person ride? A miniature horse.
20. You’re so short; if you pull up your pants you’d be blind.
21. Why do short people have a hard time raising a family? Because they struggle to put food on the table.
22. “Keep looking up.” – Motivational advice for most people. Necessary advice for short people.
23. “What do you want to be when you grow up?” – Tall person to short person
24. You know you’re short when you can do pull-ups on a door handle.
25. You know you’re short if you think the people on the wedding cake are the actual bride and groom.
26. You’re so short; you can’t reach your own head.
27. Why do short people always have food in their teeth? Because they can’t pick up a toothpick.
28. I was shocked to read in the papers today that a dwarf had been pickpocketed. I just thought to myself “how could someone stoop so low?”
29. What do short people call an iPad? A desktop computer.
30. Why do the short people like flying coach? The extra legroom.
31. What does a short pirate do with a toothpick? They use it as a peg leg.
32. You know you’re short when you use an espresso cup as a regular coffee mug.
33. Why do short people love shoe stores? The mirrors are the perfect height.
34. You know you’re short when your kids can keep things out of your reach.
35. Why did the short guy drop out of college? Because he couldn’t reach the higher education.
36. Why was the short person stuck in the elevator? Because they couldn’t reach the ‘door open’ button.
37. How does a short person take a bath? They get into the sink!
38. What’s a short person’s favorite thing on the menu? Short ribs.
39. Why shouldn’t you hire short people as chefs? Because the steaks are too high.
40. Two tall guys walk into a bar. Why didn’t the short guy walk into the bar too? He walked under it.
41. You know you’re short when your own shoelaces hit you in the head.
42. Why did the short guy lose the race? He was a little slow.
43. What do short people call burritos? Sleeping bags.
44. What do you call a door for short people? A doggy door.
45. What position does a short person play on a basketball team? The ball.
46. A diet soda is a regular soda for a short person.
47. How do short people go dress shopping? They buy t-shirts
48. How do you win an argument with a short person? You stoop to their level.
49. Why couldn’t the short guy finish the fun-sized candy bar? It was too big!
50. Why did the short guy wear stilts? So he could be as tall as everyone else.
51. Have you heard about those self-driving cars? Turns out it was just a bunch of short people driving around.
52. Why was the short lady scared of the iguana? She thought it was Godzilla.
53. You know you’re short when people ask you which Minion character you played in the movie.
54. Why did the short guy buy the house with the water fountain? Because he’s always wanted to own a swimming pool.
55. Why did the short guy start bodybuilding? Because he thought it would make him taller.